Will You Press The Button?

micmic259 years ago

I demand my payment of $1,000,000 from this bank NOW! Where's that cheeseburger I ordered 30 minutes ago!? Don't act like that, silly, you love me. I'm reclaiming this house, this car, and your hottest daughter as rightfully mine.

BobMcBurger2 years ago

“your hottest daughter” I see where this is going.

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SkylerFazbear1239 years ago

*whispers* im a murderer- wait... OH GOD NOOOO

The-Ratz8 years ago

*murders someone* Says to cop "I didn't do it" Gets away

Watertoon9 years ago

I'M PRESIDENT DICTATOR OF THE GRAMMAR POLICE ANY ATTEMPTS TO THINK WILL BE PROHIBITED ONLY ON OPPOSITE DAY. BUT SINCE TODAY IS OPPOSITE DAY IS A PARADOX I'M GOING TO SHUT UP.

EmilStvring7 years ago

Wut did I just read?

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Viva la potato9 years ago

Scanning... 100% match for DONALD TRUMP

xccxxccx9 years ago

I believe my lies anyways.

Yukitai4 years ago

It"s not a lie if you believe it, stupid. If you believe it but it"s wrong, then it"s not a lie.

Watermelonman8 years ago

I can fly! Oh, that"s true! Wee... Oh shit oh shit im falling!!?

Watermelonman8 years ago

Stupid accidental question mark ruining everything!

lifehacker4208 years ago

*Calls up Donald Trump: "You owe me a small loan of a million dollars."*

NotTheProtagonist3 years ago

*calls you* “Excuse me, but you owe me a small loan of a million dollars plus 5 years worth of interest.”

Whatamidoing38 years ago

Me:THE WORLD IS A LIE *world explodes*

Watermelonman8 years ago

This statement is false.

Raven Felix Null12 years ago

So then I wouldn't feel guilty.

Lonely Pizza 9 years ago

I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob I didn't kill Bob

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Vantage8 years ago

I'll just say im God and tell the people I don't want to continue living to die. They would believe my lies and then profit...... :D

Flameice2 8 years ago

Tell trump he isn't president on national TV. Saved the world

Watermelonman8 years ago

...paper documents...

Peter Derp'n Herp12 years ago

I'm sexy... I'm god... you love me... geez

ZaneP12 years ago

That's the deepest thing I've ever seen on this website.

TrueOtaku5279 years ago

Lol same

Tim Smith12 years ago

So essentially everything you say is true?

SeabassJames9 years ago

Only in people's minds. Saying that the floor is lava would make everyone think it's lava, but it would not actually become lava.

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Spoopy-Scary-Skeleton8 years ago

So if I said I was beautiful people would believe me including myself? Fuck yeah I'm down.

Aajj3 years ago

No guilty conscience, win-win

WeirdoGeorge9 years ago

Wow m8

SemiIsback7 years ago

Uhh.... someone stole a million dollars from my bank account can i have it back? me in private: Yessss

lovely girl10 years ago

Umm idk yes i guess lol idk so bad

Vo1demor74 years ago

I need that right now. Could pretend I actually enjoyed life

LegoMania279 years ago

Guy in shops: That will be €100,000. Me: Actually, I have a deal with the manager where I can get anything I want for free.

OliverDreammur7 years ago

I'm gay.

SillySherbert1911 years ago

I don't trust myself enough.

Sophwiphwi9 years ago

I sometimes do believe them

dan_broski8 years ago

hey trump I president so yeah bank where is my 298383837373773738388383838383 euros

SemiIsback7 years ago

hey translate it to $

Haley Smith12 years ago

So... what's the downside to this? lol

kirby72779 years ago

I BELIEVE I CAN FLY

Leahj1275 years ago

I'll just believe I'm famous. Boom!!

Rawr_Oswald9 years ago

I could say I hate you (lieng and belive it)easy way to get out of something

quirkycloudy9 years ago

"i am smart...i am smart....i am smart? I am smart"

DearDean7 years ago

I didn't commit mass genocide.

Duonne11119 years ago

Actually when i think highly of myself i talk to you as if we're equal than its not hard to believe you could one day be great

lizabean8 years ago

Loophole

Helen Clark12 years ago

I can pay for that...

Darling-kun9 years ago

Or "I already gave you the money

GlutNy7 years ago

Nothing changes

Tom Bombadil10 years ago

That makes it more convincing if you think you're telling the truth.

TyphoonWolf8 years ago

rnAquaBane101 1 month ago | Likes: 0rnDONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BYrnTHE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE.TOMMOROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOWrnYOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY.rn1. say your name...[Show full comment]

TeamAwesomeness3 years ago

This contradicts the definition of lie. a lie is something the speaker knows is false.

TatteredThought9 years ago

So you always tell the truth according to you. You cannot lie, you can only be mistaken.

Miguel Angel12 years ago

That changes nothing

twotree9 years ago

i think its a paradox, because if you think of someting you can tell its true or false, so you cant be like this, okay lets say you forget the truth if you say it or write it, and belive in your lie, then nothing would make you you, beacuse if you know you...[Show full comment]

DaRealConMan4 years ago

Tell Donald Trump that the 2020 Election was not rigged, and he’ll believe you. It’s a win-win situation.

Meow=^-^=9 years ago

DONT READ THIS. YOU WILL BE KISSED ON THE NEAREST POSSIBLE FRIDAY BY THE LOVE OF YOUR LIFE. TOMORROW WILL BE THE BEST DAY OF YOUR LIFE. NOW YOU'VE STARTED READING THIS. DON'T STOP. THIS IS SO FREAKY. 1. say your name ten times. 2.say your mom's name five ...[Show full comment]

ZippyDoggey8 years ago

So true

Fire_and_Ice_MD9 years ago

people already believe my lies, and I don't want to say something and completely change my memory

yolo4life6 years ago

So I'm gay

LEBRON JAM9 years ago

so if you said you could jump a cliff and not die you would do it?

Diane Vink12 years ago

I don't see a backside?

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